Mythic Love Principles

 

We all know the principles that don’t work:
Possession/Exclusivity/Ownership/ Manipulation/Control, .
Based on these principles love always contracts.

The basic principles which undergird Mythic Love are:
“Choose Love over Fear” and “Expand to Include”

Here is our conversation of about Mythic Love principles:

1) As a Human-Divine we are all expressions of one Magnificent Being which is experiencing itself through our individual lives. “The Divine is having an Alorah experience” would be one way of stating this point of view. Living love at this level enables us to have compassion for our humanity without being bound by our human concerns and to offer to the Divine the best experience we possibly can of what it is like to be Human-Divine.

2) Through perceiving and connecting to the Divine in each other we elevate love to the Mythic Dimension and feed archetypal needs which the psyche requires for health and well-being. Our culture currently has no apparent resource that directly addresses these soul imperatives. Nourishing our psyche produces a felt sense of oneness, belonging, divine connection and well-being..

3) Most of the problems that exist in romance result from extremes of “either/or” thinking that produces further insecurity and attempts at controlling the other. We get trapped by seeing only two options —neither one of which brings fulfillment and joy. “Staying” doesn’t feel good, “leaving” doesn’t feel good. “Adapting” doesn’t bring joy, “fighting” produces more wounding and creates a further sense of separation.

A solution we’ve found to such dialectical trapping comes from “triangular thinking” which transcends the mind. It raises ones sight to the Priest/Priestess level and achieves the transcendence of transpersonal love. Training the mind to perceive at this level is part of the practice that sustains Mythic Love.

4) As Human Divines we live in a body, it is our physical presence that experiences life. The gift that we have to offer God/Goddess is feeling our bodies in divine, sacred ways. Pleasure is how we give thanks for existence and Eros is venerated. Appreciating Eros, nourishing it and sustaining our love with erotic vitality is of central importance to the health and well-being of great love.

5) In romantic relationships, Eros is what ignites connection, passion, and joy of living. Built into most relationships is a challenge that secretly drains Eros out of the couples' experience of each other -monogomy. Patriarchal Monogamous relationships are essentially agreements that say "I'll control myself if you'll control yourself." Since Eros cannot flourish in an environment of control, the magic which fuels romance is easily diminished. Contrary to patriarchal conditioning, trusting in Eros and supporting its freedom will actually bring more Eros to life. “Between nothing and sex” there is a whole range of loving - sharing such Eros is good for most loves.

Frequently, to counteract the loss of Eros, couples eventually engage in polyamory as a way to reinject Eros into their relationship. But because unconscious polyamory is still based on personal, Egoic, desire more wounding and drama frequently results.

6) Stories of Separation. A letter from Alorah to our community reveals this important development in cultivating presence and chosing our emotional and mental state instead of unconsciously being enslaved to auto-responses and Egoic fears:
Dear All,

I am writing to tell you my personal experience of how the stories of separation we tell ourselves become disempowering and selffulfilling in hopes that we can all learn from my self-observation.

This past Sunday morning, Sunyata and I shared a wonderful experience with our guest Mary Ann as we all snuggled in bed together before attending the fair. The experience was much like the mornings we have shared with Sandy and with Grace - wonderfully natural and inclusive, sensuous without being sexual, and inspiring to participate in as well as to model. A felt demonstration of the new paradigm of connecting that allows us to be more physically engaging together without the negative energies of contraction, separation and jealousy. A very good thing. The loving integrity of each person present is consciousness at its highest level and feels to me like an important new way for Sunyata and I to serve in our Priest/Priestess capacity as a couple through love.

Later that day, as we came home to take a nap and refresh for the evening festivities, Sunyata and I had a small, unspoken misunderstanding that had me feel separate and unconsidered by him. (And him by me although I didn't know it at the time.) So from that small, ridiculously unimportant moment, a story began growing in me of how I was ending up in my maternal feminine taking care of everybody, how I needed and deserved his attention, was not feeling loved, didn't feel special, blah, blah, blah.

And that story grew so big in my experience that it permeated my energy field and caused the exact thing I was fearing - Sunyata could feel my contraction and neediness (which of course weren't attractive), that caused him to be less demonstrative wih his love, blah, blah, blah.

The experience was present for us all of that night and all the next day. I knew the story I was telling myself was ridiculous - completely off from the truth (which we had just experienced in spades the day before), and yet I couldn't break its negative grip.

I started looking at my experience through the triangle model, seeing the dialectic at the bottom of staying conracted and feeling stuck or releasing my contraction and being free of its grip, but I couldn't authentically find a way to that place. It kept looking like Sunyata needed to show me his love for me to get free.

Instead what happened was that I finally got to the place where I could access my own love for Sunyata, and somehow, through doing that, my contraction released and I, my high self, was back.

Of couse since I was free of the story, he also was free, and then we did our usual stellar job of observing our process for the gifts that it brings. Yay!

I share all this because it so presensed for me the power of stories to create our reality, disempower ourselves, and actually bring into existence the separation we fear. I trust that somehow this sharing will make it easer for each of us in our ComeUnity to nip our stories in the bud and continue dwelling in high glory together. I also request that anytime anyone is "telling a story" that we support them by helping them see it's a story, rather than going into agreement with them and confirming their view.

As I see it, ComeUnity isn't some idealized place where process never happens, it is a harmonic space where everyone knows the truth that they are loved and everyone is supported in releasing their story of separation when they are feeling unloved. No one takes themselves away, judges and rejects other people, which creates separation. Instead we triangulate things, observe the dialectics we're in, and find the belonging we seek through accessing our own power to love.

May my story serve each of us as we dance with each other in ever expanding circles of inclusion and joy.

Blessings,

Alorah